Notes

You know how at one point, we all have a certain song we can completely relate to? It is days like these where mornings appear bleak that you start to wonder how you particularly feel about that day, and how the weather might actually affect your way of thinking. The morning here has been relatively chirpy. I sit here in the centre with a good enough view of the campus - teachers brisk walking past corridors, students dragging feet through stony hallways, gardeners toiling on beloved pastures of green - with the hope that everything today and hereon will go smooth if not unspoiled. I've been in the doldrums for a while knowing how stiff competition here is and just how immense the pressure can be. Everyone here is great in every way. Just like every other institution, the talents and skills of the people here are unimaginably admirable to the point that if you aren't good in at least one aspect, you feel out of the circle. I tell myself to not let that get in my way, and just try to be good at every point so that I don't appear a defeatist for fear that it might be called upon the judgment of other people towards me, and that is the last thing I would really want now.

But as always, I digress. The song that I was mentioning is Broken by Lifehouse. The more I listen to it, the more intriguing the lyrics become, and the more I think, the more I feel as though self-fulfillment is understood.

The broken locks were a warning you got inside my head
I tried my best to be guarded, I'm an open book instead
I still see your reflection inside of my eyes
That are looking for a purpose, they're still looking for life